Dear Twitter humorists,
If you've had a tweet from me asking if you want to be part of this book you may have had questions, wondered if it's some sort of invasive, blanket tweet, or been reluctant to reply to a stranger. I hope this blog will give me the chance to explain it in more than 140 characters.
This book has been my 2010 labour of love, which I've worked on since March. I know of many tweeters in this book who are going through hard times; some of them could really do with a boost, and this book is a concrete reminder that whatever we're dealing with, and whoever we have to be to deal with it, we are also creative and funny. Humour can save the world - or at least make it a better place to be in.
I've had no financial gain from this project, but if it does well every person will benefit from his or her share in it. The idea is that everyone involved benefits, although the printer and distributor, for the convenience they give us (which is helpful), take $5.61 of each $8.65 sale - almost 2/3rds.
I am doing a rewrite to take out anyone I haven't heard from by the end of January 2011 and give others a chance to be in it, but first want to make sure everyone has seen my messages and had the opportunity to get back to me. It's scary, being a shy person, and it keeps me up at night, trying to communicate with all the people I don't know yet, but what lovely people there are on Twitter! All but two I've heard back from so far have been enthusiastic about being included. Thank you for your happiness, good wishes and good humour! Every day I go to the post office with more books to send off, to the U.K., Germany, Hungary, the Netherlands, Mexico, New Zealand, the U.S., Poland and Canada. How wonderful is that?
BOOK DESCRIPTION
"This is a small, illustrated jokebook filled with puns (rated for everyone) on film and song titles. It is compiled from Twitter(tm) threads added to by credited contributors from around the world, and the only rule is that they can't be real titles. It's surprising how many people have the same dreadful sense of humour. Here are some examples: #bodypartfilms "Lobe, Actually." #kitchenhorrormovies "Village Of The Jammed." #furnituresongs "Sofa Away From Me." #catanddogfilms "Pup Fiction." #horsefilms "A Groom With A View." #poultrymovies "Buffy, The Vampire Layer." #combifusionfilms "Brief Interviews With Hideous Men In Tights." #tailortunes "You Are Sew Beautiful." #dogsongs "It Mastiff Been Love." #scaryclothingmovies "Invasion Of The Bodice-Snatchers." Threads can be added onto very quickly, but after a few days of neglect they disappear. The ones in this book have been preserved, like figs, the rotten ones discarded, and the good ones set up in jars with judiciously-added cartoons. If you like figs, or figgy pudding, you may find this book to your taste. Any profits from this book will be split between tweeters: let me know if you're in it and I have not been able to reach you!"
LETTER
This is the letter I'm sending out to everyone who has given me an address:
"Here is your copy of “Poultrymovies, Dogsongs And Other Witty Tweet Jokes,” which I hope you will enjoy! I think it's lovely to see all our jokes in a book. You retain copyright over your tweet(s) if that's possible - they may be too short. My plan for royalties is that after initial costs (including purchasing and mailing copies to contributors), and counting the front cover as 10 “tweets” and interior cartoons as 5 apiece, profits of $3.04 earned per book sold on Amazon will be split 831 ways, so that each tweet you are credited with will earn 1/831 of profits. We may not get rich, but I hope you'll appreciate my attempts to be fair and make us all smile.
With every good wish, Maggie Rowe
P.S. Please let me know by Jan. 31st via Twitter @rowemag if you want to stay in the book, If you don't, I will let someone else have your spot. I hope you do!"
THE NUMBER OF TWEETS
I counted 831 with illustrations factored in (see above). One tweet has since been removed, and one other is to be. If I haven't heard back from the rest of the tweeters by the end of January this number will change again, but I do have enough other wonderful punners to fill in spaces. One tweeter has declined a share in royalties, so an option is that I send your share to someone you designate, or to a charity of your choice, or roll it back into the general division pool.
I would like to thank @travelmaus, @RussWillis and @DerryGriffin for being first readers and encouragers, everyone who has said "yes," and also detractors who spurred me to figure out how to explain myself better. With regards to that, I apologize for explaining so badly when I started out. I knew I had to show the book to people so they could see what I was talking about, but was also worried about trying to contact everyone, so I put that part off. *Note to self: ask for more courage next lifetime.
One tweet alone doesn't last long, but collated, edited and illustrated we have something! Or at least something to keep in the bathroom and prove to family members that we are actually quite witty.
